


Braids

by Zoya113



Category: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Gen, Look I’m just leaking my whole collection of Schaeffer fics abt now, We rlly stole zep dialogue, i never got over power couple and it shows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:40:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24352246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zoya113/pseuds/Zoya113
Summary: Schaeffer is surprisingly good with hair
Relationships: Melissa & Colonel Schaeffer (The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	Braids

**Author's Note:**

> Gang i used to not wanna post my Schaeffer & Melissa fics bc like who is the audience but u know what idc

“What’s that for?” 

Melissa let out a squawk of surprise at the sound of the colonel’s voice and whipped around to find her in the doorway. “Schaeffer?” 

“Yes?” 

“What’re you doing here?” She let out a surprised laugh. Sometimes Schaeffer just showed up whenever she liked, it was always a surprise. She didn’t have a phone after all.

“I had a weekend off. What’s the dress for?” She repeated again, showing herself into Melissa’s apartment. 

“There’s a girl on my softball team who’s having a party tonight, uh, you wanna come?” She offered. It was sort of weird not to hang out with her on the rare occasion she was in town, but she couldn’t just cancel with an hours notice. 

“Oh,” Schaeffer shook her head. “I don’t want to hang out with a bunch of twenty something year olds. All you type do is talk about,” she took a pause as if to find a good example. “Artisanal beers. If I wanted to hang out with kids I’d just take the cadets out.”

“In our defence we also talk about soy milk,” she joked, trying to fix up the braid she had messily tied up into her hair. It was awkward because she was half out the door and Schaeffer didn’t seem to get that. 

“Where’s your cat?” She asked instead. 

“On the cat tree in my room,” she answered. “Don’t worry. She’s out of the way. Uh, did you wanna drive down with me or something?” She didn’t really want to kick her out. 

“Is that a braid?” She then asked, only just noticing it. 

Melissa nodded. “Yeah! What do you think?” She brushed it over her shoulder. “I haven’t done these in years, I thought it might be fun!” 

“It looks awful.”

Her friend’s blunt honesty was something she would never get used to. “Awww, Schaeffer!” She whined, “do you think I should-?”

“Sit down. I’ll fix it.” 

“Uh, Schaeffer-“

“It’ll take five minutes,” she pointed at the couch. “Don’t complain, I’m not letting you out of the house like that,” she rolled her eyes like she was some beauty guru all of a sudden, ushering her over to the couch and Melissa let her. Mostly because she was always just vaguely touch starved, but also because it would at least let Schaeffer believe she had helped.

Sure, Melissa wasn’t an excellent hair stylist. She liked wearing her hair out, she never felt the need to braid it when a ponytail would do the job. She wasn’t an expert, but she wasn’t awful. Schaeffer in the other hand could never even seem to get all her hair in one hair tie. She always had loose strands sticking out that bothered the life out of Melissa. But she would let her think she contributed, then she’d just take it out in the car. 

She crossed her legs as she sat down on the floor, pulling her braid out and letting her hair fall down her back as Schaeffer marched over. She looked out of place in her uniform in between all of Melissa’s things - cute little trinkets and pastel coloured pillows, it really helped highlight how scary Schaeffer tended to look which was why she wasn’t surprised she was so rough. 

As she combed her fingers through Melissa’s hair she quickly began to regret it. She actually had to dig her nails into her carpet and brace herself so Schaeffer didn’t pull her over. 

“You’re squirming,” Schaeffer noted, grabbing a handful of her hair and parting it to one side. “What do you want?” 

“Uh, just a braid is fine,” she tried not to let the fact she was freaking out show through her voice. 

Schaeffer scoffed. “Well I knew that. What sort?” 

“The... regular kind?” She stammered, and Schaeffer gave no further warning before the pulling started again. She wouldn’t be surprised if she lost a chunk of her hair to this once it was over. A risk she had not calculated. Maybe this was some sort of ploy to give her a headache so she couldn’t go to the party and she would have to stay here and then they could hang out. She was actually starting to reminisce for five minutes ago when her scalp wasn’t being pulled off. “Hey Schaeffer? You’re- You’re hurting me a little bit.” 

“I’m nearly done,” she reported. “Just sit still, give me a hair tie.” 

To do that, she had to lift her hand up, a terrible mistake, the next move of Schaeffer’s fingers just about rolled her over. 

Schaeffer laughed. “Do we need to tie you down? Just sit still!” Easier said than done when she was but a young secretary and the person doing her hair was a hardened soldier from a classified military organisation. 

“You’re just pulling really hard!” 

“Well did you even see your own work?” She quipped. “It’s because you weren’t firm enough.”

The torture finally came to an end as she felt Schaeffer wrap her hair tie around the base of her braid, her scalp was sore but she did have to admit the braid looked lovely as she ran her fingers over it. Every hair was in place, not a single strand loose. “I didn’t take you for the kind of person to be good with hair.” She didn’t want to fiddle with it too much in case it came loose and Schaeffer had to do it all over again. 

“Everyone says that!” She grunted. “But I’m surprised more people aren’t good at it, it’s just like tying knots!”

She shook her head. “You should never compare rope to hair.” That was a rule of thumb. She was very curious to Schaeffer’s hair routine now, and whether or not she actually had one. “Do you ever do anything with your own hair?” She got up onto the couch, smoothing a finger through a loose curl of hers. Schaeffer was very uncomfortable with that but she didn’t do anything but squirm. 

“When I’m working undercover I get to handle it all myself, but you don’t want to be dressing up too much around the guys,” she shrugged it off, her eyes suddenly darting to the side. Very unlike her. 

“Oh?” Melissa leant back, trying to catch a glimpse of her expression. 

“You know. They’re men,” Schaeffer shook her head, leaning back with a sigh and thwacking one hand up against Melissa’s shoulder as if that counted as an answer. “They’ll make fun of anything.”

“Oooh,” she cooed, nursing her shoulder. “So what you’re saying is you have a secret girly side?” She leant into her, excited. She would kill to have a normal hang out with her friend. Do something like a sleep over or clothes shopping without it being derailed by one of her sudden urges to fight crime. 

“I do not have sides!” Schaeffer stammered. “I am very transparent!” She was never the most eloquent. “Don’t make this something it isn’t, and stop leaning on me!” She got up from the couch as it to distance herself from all of Melissa’s cute little decorations, standing in the middle of her apartment with her chest puffed out and her shoulders square. Just a reminder that she was in fact not at all, not in the slightest, not even the tiniest bit girly. “See!” 

“Oh sure, Schaeffer!” Melissa giggled, standing up after her and bringing her braid forward to show it off. 

“Hey, don’t look at me like that. I don’t wanna see that big smile of yours,” she turned her back to Melissa, pointing at the door. “You have a party to get to. I’ll show myself out!” 

She wouldn’t test Schaeffer’s fragile temper. She let out one final appreciate giggle and held a finger to her lips as she made her way to the door. “Don’t worry Schaeffer, your secret is safe with me!”


End file.
